We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company.
I was wondering why my stripped-down home phone was still costing me so much per month (about $45). So I examined the bill, and realized that they've been charging me $4.75 a month for the b.s. Inside Wire Maintenance Service Plan. It was labelled as "optional" but I sure as heck don't ever remember requesting such a service. It's useless if you're only renting. Anyway, after a half an hour of navigating the byzantine BellSouth service phone menus, it's gone...

Hmmm, I thought I had cancelled my long distance carrier on my home line too. But then I see they're still charging me for MCI's PrimeTime Friends and Family plan. So I call MCI to cancel. They put me on hold for a half an hour. Finally I talk to someone, who transfers me to the automated cancellation line. (Gee, they could allow someone to go to an automated line automatically, but that would be too easy). On the automated line they ask me if I've already chosen another carrier through my residential phone service. I select "no", because I'm not switching, I'm canceling. The automated voice tells me that to cancel my long distance through MCI, I must first choose another carrier through my local service -- "Goodbye". Dial tone. Rrrrrrrr...

I call back. Another half hour wait. My ear is sweaty. Finally I tell the operator about the dilemma in their cancellation menu. This time they try to sell me on a new option -- no monthly fee, $0.35 connection plus $0.07/minute for long distance. I tell her no, just cancel the damn thing. She says okay, but you'll have to go though the cancellation menu. "Now, it's going to hang up on you if you answer 'no' to that question..." "So I should say 'yes'?" She laughs. "I can't officially counsel you to do that, but..." "Gotcha. Let's do it." I wait another minute. Instead of the cancellation menu, she comes back on, to ask me if I want to switch to their local service! No thanks, I'm fine with BellSouth. But, having had a few minutes to think, I tell her I want to go with the $0.35 connection/$0.07 per minute option. If we never use it, it costs nothing. You can bet I'll be examining next month's bill with a magnifying glass, though.